the air

I’ve come across many students over the past few years who are too proud to ask for help. In fact, I too have been proud at times to ask my friends for assistance with courses, life, or other matters. The main reason for this behavior is that many of us strongly believe that we should do things on our own and by being helped, we feel inferior or inadequate. However, my experience has shown me that asking for help, when you need it even a little bit, can go a long way and help facilitate matters much more quickly.

Jennifer over at Broke-Ass Student has a great post about networking and giving. It is essential for any successful person to network effectively and be magnanimous with their peers. I want to expand on what she has written by suggesting that asking for help does not make you weak.

None of us would be here today without some help from others. For many of us, our parents have played an integral role in ensuring that we have and learn all the tools required to realize success. In addition to our parents, our teachers have also played a pivotal role by reinforcing some of the values our parents taught as well as new values and knowledge. So in a way, we have been helped since the beginning. Then why do we still refuse to seek out help when we absolutely need it?

Would you rather suffer now or later? Say you have a need to find an apartment in an unfamiliar city but you do know a good friend who lives in that very city. Wouldn’t it be logical for you to simply ask your friend if he/she can help you find an apartment? The worst they can answer is say no to you. However, if he/she say yes, then you can rest assured knowing that someone can help you find an apartment in an unfamiliar city. I had a friend who was moving to my area and was in need of housing. Rather than ask me for help, he simply went about searching by himself. To his dismay, he had to take a few days off from his new job just to go apartment hunting and he ended up finding an apartment that was way overpriced and offered little incentives. In the end, he hated his apartment and regret the missed opportunity to ask me for some minor help.

Those who offer help are a rare breed!I cannot stress how important it is for anyone to recognize those helpful souls who consistently offer to help before you even ask them for help. Some of my friends get annoyed by me when I offer to help them, but they always fail to realize that my assistance is very unique because I never ask for anything in return. In fact, most of my friends now take me up on my offer of help and are extremely thankful. Sadly, I have to be more selective when I offer my help, otherwise it gets out of hand. You should not feel that you are taking advantage of someone if you accept their offer or ask them for help because that illicit thought should not exist between genuine friends.

By asking for help or accepting help, you will expand your network base as well. Help does not necessarily have to come from friends either. If you need assistance, be smart and accept it. Arrogance and foolishness will only lead to more problems and cause you further discomfort with the situation. I learned this lesson in a very hard way, but in the end, I was taught that asking for help is definitely a positive thing because the only worst case scenario is someone refusing to help me. In that case, all I had/have to do is simply ask someone else. So don’t be shy and go get help when you need it.

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